No. of relationships I've been in: None

No. of people I asked out: None

No. of acceptors: N.A.

No. of rejectors: N.A.

No. of people who asked me out: None

No. of people I accepted: N.A.

No. of people I rejected: N.A.

No. of Valentines' days I didn't spend single: None

No. of Christmases I didn't spend single: None

No. of birthdays I didn't spend single: None

No. of non-celebrity crushes I've had: A Gazillion

Haha, nice.